Hatebears
A strategy that deploys small creatures with disruptive static abilities — “hating” on opponents’ strategies while still presenting a clock. Unlike stax which locks the game entirely, hatebears selectively tax specific strategies.
How Hatebears Work
Each hatebear is a creature (usually 2-3 mana) with a static ability that makes certain actions harder or impossible. Stack multiple hatebears to create a web of restrictions that opponents can’t easily play through.
Key Hatebears
- Thalia, Guardian of Thraben — noncreature spells cost 1 more
- Drannith Magistrate — can’t cast from anywhere except hand
- Aven Mindcensor — opponents can only search top 4
- Containment Priest — exile noncast creatures
- Collector Ouphe — shuts off all artifact abilities
Death and Taxes
The most famous hatebears deck is “Death and Taxes” — a white-based Legacy deck that combines tax effects with Aether Vial (flash in hatebears for free) and Wasteland (mana denial). The name comes from the Benjamin Franklin quote.
Hatebears in Commander
Hatebears slot into many Commander archetypes. Even non-hatebear decks often include a few key hate pieces. Thalia alone warps how opponents sequence their turns.
See Also
- Creature — A card type representing beings that can attack and block in combat. Creatures have power (damage dealt) and toughness (damage absorbed) shown as P/T in the bottom right. They’re the backbone of most decks and strategies. Merch · from $16.99 "Stack Resolves" Ceramic mug. Dishwasher + microwave safe. Shipped on demand by Printify. Get this […]